i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize