You're my little dorito
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Just pee around me
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
