sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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