I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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