Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
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