my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
It's just like the Real World with babies
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
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