I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
