You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize
