I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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