Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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