dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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