You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
