i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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