jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
