every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
We have so much sex to catch up on
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
