I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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