If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
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