so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize
