I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
My Sexting was not on an AP level
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
