3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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