Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
