Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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