I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
