Three words: puerto rican gang bang
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize