I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
soo... how was my night?
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