awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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