You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
