brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
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