He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
