I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
True strength comes from lack of pants
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
