I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
