Don't make out with my wife yet
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
