I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize