butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
