so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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