Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
