I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Terrible idea I love it
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
