Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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