He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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