Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
