Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
