sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
