I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
