i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
