After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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