You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
We have so much sex to catch up on
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
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