Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Randomize
