Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
