i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
