you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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